Live in a Novel

Jennospot 68  Live in a Novel

Oi live in an' ordin'ry sorta 'ouse wot ain't nuffink special, 'cept it's sorta cosy, 'specially in the winter, 'cos we've gotta big warm kitchen wiv a stove. But yew know, ever since Oi wrote moi first book ("Jenno's Widdlin'ton", wot's free from http://www.smashwords.com/b/128813) people 'ave been askin' me peculiar questions about where Oi live. So in the finish, Oi wrote a little poem about it. 'Ere it is. Oi 'ope yew loike it:

Live an a Novel

Some people reckon writers live in a novel,

    Hovel
Wot's got furniture all sparse an' scanty;
But if'n Oi write sea-songs or books of the sea,
Ain’t it rather a shanty?
    Shanty

An if'n Oi write of the famous an' rich;

An' of their dark doin's Oi yell;
The biographer's trade then 'as me made,
Oi c'n live in a saucy, "Oh tell!"

Hotel

 If'n Oi write about pixies, an' fairies, an' elves

In magical forests to roam.
Or' write o' them chaps in little red caps;
P'raps, then Oi live in a gnome…

Home

If Oi'm too wordy, then Oi jus' gotta shed…

Shed

People reckon as 'ow Oi quite able.

Loike a sheep, Oi agree, 'cos Oi've gotta quill pen

Pen

An' a room, wiv a chair, an' 'its table.

Stable

If yew're a specialist, installed in yer niche,

Stall, niche

Such as cookin', or travel an' that…

Or p'raps music's yer fing, an' yew sing as yew string

Out yer words by the bar, in A flat.

Bar, flat

Write o' prisons, an' then yew'll be needin' a cell.

Cell

Then watch biddin' go 'igher an' 'igher…

We'd all loike a pile in a while from our style;

Pile, sty

Cripes, ev'ryone seeks out a buyer.

Byre

 Wotever yer dwellin', we'd all loike ter be

Dwelling

Rollin' in roses an' clover;

Mintin' the money… not pen-shunnin' scribes;

Pension

Under covers wot are sellin' all over.

Covers.

Wherever yew live, an' wotever yew write, don' get discouraged.

Luv from Jenno.

By the way, Peter St John's "Gang Rivalry" is free on 3 an' 4 June: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004YL626M (USA) or http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B004YL626M (UK).

Normally Oi'm real modest about fings loike this, but this toime Oi jus' gotta tell yew, all secret loike, that all Peter's "Gang" books 'ave got me in 'em… Well, yew don't 'ave ter read 'em if'n yew don't want, do yew?